Five Letters
by Two Phantoms
Summary: My take on how Barry says goodbye to his family and closest friends during the Crossover episodes, right before he tells the gathered team of his decision to turn himself over to the Dominators. Is in cannon and takes place along with the events of the Crossover. Story is complete.
1. IntroductionSummary

_**Five Letters**_

 _ **By TwoPhantoms**_

 **Disclaimer:** The characters from The Flash, Arrow, Supergirl and Legends of Tomorrow are the property of Warner Brothers, DC Comics and Berlanti Productions. I sincerely thank them for letting me borrow their characters, in the hopes of enhancing the characters' stories for my own enjoyment and that of others. This story is for entertainment purposes ONLY. If you would like to add it to an archive, please just let me know.

 **Summary:** My take on how Barry says goodbye to his family and closest friends during the Crossover episodes, right before he tells the gathered team of his decision to turn himself over to the Dominators.

 **Time Frame:** Takes place during and immediately after the events of the Crossover episodes of Supergirl 2x08 "Medusa"; The Flash 3x09 "Invasion"; Arrow 5x09 "Invasion"; and DC Legends of Tomorrow 2x09 "Invasion".

 **Author's Notes:** I have written fanfiction for Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Janet Evanovich's Stephanie Plum, and even an Alias Crossover with Scarecrow and Mrs. King. This is my first venture into writing for the world of The Flash. I thoroughly enjoy reading what others have come up with, especially since The Flash is in my top five all-time favorite TV shows. The writing, the acting, and especially the heartfelt emotion, have grabbed me to the point that I can spend an entire weekend binge watching past episodes and current episodes when there's nothing else on and real-life has nothing major planned for me. After watching the Invasion episodes, and most importantly the LOT completion arc, it bothered me that Barry, while noble, was going to sacrifice himself without so much as saying goodbye to those he loves and would be leaving behind. So my muse decided to start whispering in my ear, and the result was this story. I hope you enjoy it. A huge thank you goes out to Jan for taking the time out her busy schedule to beta this story for me. I couldn't do this without you.

This story is a complete work of fiction. The opinions expressed by the characters within this story, in no way reflect the opinions of the series creators.

 **Rating:** PG (K+ on )

 **Completed** : Jan. 2017 (I actually started this story right after the cross-over originally aired, but with real life and holidays and real life, it took a bit longer to get the story ready to post). I hope you enjoy.


	2. Prologue

**Prologue**

Oliver Queen stood inside the little lab van where only the day before Professor Stein and Jax had shared the message from future Barry warning them about the coming war, forcing the young speedster to share the secret of Flashpoint. Now he was once again in the tiny space, only this time he was trying to convince his friend, someone he considered a brother, not to do something rash and stupid. The Green Arrow had quite a few friends that, in truth, he considered brothers. First there had been his best friend Tommy Merlin (who was in a strange way really his brother, considering Tommy had been Thea's biological half-brother) who had died as a result of Malcom's need to destroy the Glades. Then there was John Diggle, a brother who stood by him through all of his mistakes and was his voice of reason, offering advice even when Oliver didn't want it. But neither one of these men could frustrate him more than Barry Allen. Where Dig was more like a slightly older brother, Barry was the younger, more naïve at times brother who constantly needed to be knocked upside the head and put back on the right path. This was one of those times.

Taking a deep breath, hoping that he wouldn't come off as too annoyed, Oliver tried once again to get through to the younger man. "Barry, I realize that you feel this is all your fault, that the Dominators are here because of what you did, but Agent Smith is wrong. This is not your fault. So you made a mistake, and I'm sure you've spent the better part of the last few months beating yourself up about it. We all make bad choices. I once kidnapped Lyla in front of her infant son, leaving him unattended, just to prove to Ra's al Ghul that I was someone I wasn't. It took a very long time for Dig to forgive me for that, but he did… eventually. Think about the people you're leaving behind. Your family, Joe and Iris. Especially Iris, after all this time you two are finally together. I know things are bad with Cisco right now, but he'll forgive you, he just needs time, but only if you give him that chance. Sacrificing yourself just because some underhanded Government official claims to have made a deal with these aliens is not the answer."

Barry ran a hand through his already messy hair, hair that, when he was in the suit with the cowl off never seemed to stay in place. "Oliver, I know you mean well, but there is no other choice. It's either me or thousands," he shook his head slightly. "No, make that hundreds of thousands of innocent people, both human and metahuman." He sat with his elbows on his knees, and placed his head in his hands, turning slightly to glance at the Arrow. "I've tried very hard to move past the whole Flashpoint mess, but it somehow keeps coming back and slapping me in the face. I had a great life even after what Zoom did to my dad, but I was too blinded by my own grief to realize it. I messed everything up, and this is my chance to make things right again."

"Even if this deal is real what's to guarantee that, after you give yourself up, the Dominators won't attack anyway?" Oliver crossed his arms and stared at the young man.

"I know there's no guarantee." Barry stood up and faced the blond hero. "But this is my decision. I know I could learn to live with the results of Flashpoint. But, if the Dominators go through with the destruction they're promising and I had a chance to stop it and didn't take it…Ollie, there's no way I could live with that."

They both turned at the brief knock on the inside wall and Sara poked her head in. "Sorry for the interruption, but the Waverider just returned."

Just as quickly as she'd appeared the White Canary left, and from the brief nod she'd given him, Oliver knew she was hoping he would be able to convince Barry what a foolish mistake agreeing to Agent Smith's deal would be. However, he knew it was a lost cause especially since Barry had risen from his seat, apparently deciding that the distraction meant their discussion was now over.

Barry moved towards the door and glanced back towards Oliver, "Get the team together. I need to take care of something. I'll be back in fifteen minutes to address everyone." Without giving his friend a chance to argue or shoot him with an arrow, the speedster raced out of the van and away from the hangar. He took off with only one destination in mind, hoping that no one would be home.

As he ran, he thought about his decision. He'd heard everything Oliver had said. He knew that sacrificing himself because of his guilt wasn't the answer. And he'd meant what he'd said to the Green Arrow, he wasn't doing this just because he felt guilty about Flashpoint. It was because he'd feel one hundred percent more guilty about the death of so many people when he'd had a chance to stop such an event and hadn't done so. Heroes sacrificed themselves for far less. Oliver had even played the 'world needs the Flash, the guardian of Central City card,' but Wally had speed now, and while still young and reckless, his brother had proven himself in the Flashpoint timeline. He'd be fine, and he could take up the mantle with ease. Besides, in this timeline, he'd have Caitlyn and Cisco as additional support.

There was no other choice. If he were to stay, and the Dominators attacked and destroyed all metahumans, no one would be left to send Kara home. He had no doubt the Kryptonian would survive, but Cisco would die, leaving his alien friend who didn't care about the mistakes he'd made as the Flash and who he'd dragged away from her loved ones, stuck on this Earth forever. If Supergirl had no way to get back, her family and friends would never know what had happened to her. He wasn't making this sacrifice solely to right his past wrongs, he was doing this to ensure everyone had a future.

In no time at all he reached the house he'd shared with Joe and Iris for sixteen years. At super speed he did a quick run through to make sure no one was home, before entering what was still his old room, even though he'd officially moved out, again. After closing the door, he moved over and sat down at the desk he'd spent many nights working out scientific equations, writing English papers or just getting lost in a text book that Iris would always roll her eyes at him for reading.

Now, as he sat behind the well-used wooden table, he glanced around the room. He'd suggested moving out after the Mirror Master takedown and Joe had whole-heartedly, but lovingly, kicked him out. Since then Barry had only managed to pack most of his clothes and a few necessities, essentially living out of a suitcase for the last few weeks. He hadn't planned on taking anything else until he'd found a permanent place of his own. Cisco's temporary offer of his sofa had come crashing to an early end when Caitlyn's venture as Killer Frost had revealed that Dante was dead as a direct result of Flashpoint. Then because he'd quit his job to protect Caitlyn, he'd taken up residence in one of the spare rooms at S.T.A.R. Labs. Iris had offered him the opportunity to stay with her but he didn't want to just crash at her place. If they were going to live together as a couple, he wanted to do it right and find a place that they could call theirs.

His room had seen a lot over the years. It had been privy to the late night talks between him and Iris. The times they had sat side-by-side on his bed reading books, working out word puzzles, or doing homework. He remembered the countless nights, after he had first moved into the house with Joe and Iris, when his foster father would spend hours making sure the scared and insecure little boy fell asleep feeling cared for. And now it would see him send his final goodbyes to those he loved.

From a drawer in the desk he took out sheets of paper and then found five envelopes that he quickly addressed to his two closest friends, his dad, his brother and lastly, the love of his life.

He'd promised Oliver that he'd be back in fifteen minutes, and he'd wasted half of that in wool-gathering. Knowing what he wanted to say to each of them, he used his super speed to put down on paper the words and emotions that filled his heart. In a matter of minutes he had finished all five letters. He sealed each one, raced downstairs and placed three on the dining room table, then sped out of the house over to Caitlyn's apartment, slipping one under her door, and then ran to S.T.A.R. and, unseen by those working in the building, placed the last one by Cisco's computer in his friend's lab. He then made his way at hyper-speed back to the hangar to brief the team.

 _Later that evening…_

Barry entered his temporary living quarters at S.T.A.R Labs with a spring in his step. They had won. Oliver had banded everyone together, effectively stopping him from making the ultimate sacrifice. While he knew he could have out run Oliver's arrows and even Ray in his Atom suit, it was seeing Kara standing beside Oliver that made him realize he was beaten. He was pretty sure he wouldn't have been able to speed away from her as easily. But it had been Cisco's declaration that Barry was still his friend that had been the final nail to be pulled from his noble attempt to sacrifice himself.

He knew he still had quite a few fences to mend, and he was going to make every attempt to be the hero he felt he was meant to be. He hadn't forgotten Jay Garrick's words to him at the diner after his second attempt to fix the messed-up timeline. But even more so, John Diggle's advice that Barry needed to forgive himself, repeated over and over in his head. Dig was right, the first step to moving forward was forgiveness, whether it's to the man who wore the face of your mother's killer, or forgiving yourself. He'd had the chance a year and a half ago to do exactly what he'd done more recently. Back then he'd had everyone's support, but he'd decided not to change the past. However, grief could do funny things. If only the future Flash, who'd kept him from changing the course of history the first time, had been there to stop him a second time, who knows what the present would be like now. The _what ifs_ were endless.

Barry moved over and lay down on his cot. He didn't realize how exhausting saving the world could be. He rubbed his face to alleviate some of the feeling of tiredness from his body. While he'd enjoyed the beer at the bar with Oliver and it had been relaxing, especially after the events of the last few days, heck the last few months, he was more than ready to call it a night. He needed to get changed into something to sleep in, but wasn't quite ready to make that move just yet.

He was glad Oliver had agreed to hang out with him some more before heading back to Star City. One thing the two men had never really had a chance to do was bond outside of saving a city, a pair of reincarnated hawk people, or the world. So a night out with a friend was a nice change of pace.

When the Green Arrow had first learned he'd changed the timeline, the protector of Star City hadn't lectured him but had simply said, 'you made a mistake.' Learning of how Oliver's parents had died, put his friend's acceptance into perspective. Even though Oliver hadn't been mad at him, his friend had, at the hands of the Dominators, been given a taste of what might have been if he had a chance to change his own past. That experience alone had made the bond of friendship they shared even stronger.

Cisco had offered him the use of his couch again, but even if his best friend was on the road to forgiving him, he wasn't sure tonight would be the right time to crash there. It was ironic really, when Cisco had first jumped at the chance to time travel, Barry had bit back the retort that had come to mind. It took all his courage not to state that his friend still hadn't forgiven _him_ for going back in time, but it was okay for Cisco to travel back to the distant past. He'd tried, instead, to get his friend to stay and work on the science side of things to stop the Dominators, but, in the end it had been a good thing Cisco had gone. His best friend had experienced, first hand, what going back in time to try and fix things could do. Changing even one thing, even if at the time you believe it to be the right course of action, will have unseen consequences for the future.

Apparently it took Cisco assisting an alien caught in 1951 go free, who would then decide to exterminate all metahumans on Earth, to help put the death of his brother into a whole different perspective. Barry knew that Cisco would still harbor feelings of betrayal and pain from the loss of Dante at times, but at least now his best friend wasn't going to put the full blame on him, and once again considered him a friend.

Sitting up, Barry decided it was time to get ready to sleep, and had just placed his feet on the floor when he heard the unmistakable click of heels and the steady rhythm that could only mean Iris was approaching. He thought for sure she'd be home and in bed by now and had planned on going to see her first thing in the morning, but he was more than happy to see her tonight.

He stood and, with a smile on his face, took a step towards the door to meet her. However, he quickly paused, the grin fading as she entered the room and he saw the look of fire in her eyes. His gaze fell on the paper clutched in her right hand and immediately knew he was in trouble.

"Bartholomew Allen…what the _hell_?"

In the aftermath and celebrations of the Dominators' defeat, he'd totally forgotten about the letters. He'd never gone back to collect them.


	3. Chapter 1: Iris

**Chapter 1: Iris**

Iris entered the West house, and after closing the door behind her, made her way inside. After leaving S.T.A.R. Labs, she'd gone to CC Picture News to try and get a jump-start on her article about the unfolding events. She wasn't doing anything useful at the lab, or even at the hangar with all the superheroes, so she went to do the one thing she could do, write. However, she'd only gotten as far as typing in a temporary headline of 'Aliens Really Do Exist,' before realizing she couldn't go much further than that. Did she write about beings from other planets, who wanted world domination, or about an alien who had once lived on another planet much like Earth and who looked just like a normal human female? Or perhaps that this alien woman was one of the last of her people and was striving to make a new home for herself on an Earth in a parallel universe? And would readers even believe that there were many different versions of their Earth and that this particular alien lived on one that was thirty-seven universes over from theirs? It sounded crazy in her head. She doubted it would make more sense on paper.

Besides much of what she could write would have to be censored. Obviously, she couldn't write about the people behind the masks. It had been a shock to learn that Oliver Queen, the mayor of Star City, was actually the Green Arrow. Then there was the little matter of said vigilante, members of his family and former members of 'Team Arrow' being captured by the Dominators and then escaping from the alien's spaceship which had been floating out amongst the stars in a futuristic timeship. Then there was the little matter of the billionaire Ray Palmer, once suspected of being killed in a Palmer Tech explosion but was actually alive, and had spent all his time on that same ship that could travel through time. The list of secrets about the heroes Barry had gathered was enough to make her head explode. While it still hurt a little that her father and best friend, now boyfriend, had kept her in the dark about the Flash's true identity, with all the secrets she now knew, she could understand the need for keeping some things hidden.

Even though she'd forgiven both of them for that secret, it bothered her that even now, over a year and a half later, she was learning about things Barry was keeping from her. The fact that her boyfriend had skipped to Earth 38 over six months ago, had met a very pretty and sweet alien with super powers, and had never mentioned it to her was something she wasn't happy about. Iris took a deep breath. She wasn't jealous of Kara, on the contrary, she was in awe of the woman who could fly and shoot lasers from her eyes. She knew where Barry's heart lay, however, the fact that he never shared that with her was irksome. Granted they hadn't been dating at the time, but they were still best friends. These were the type of experiences that best friends shared with each other.

Realizing she was still standing on the landing by the front door, she hung up her coat and then looked around the house she'd grown up in. It was astonishing to think about just how much her life had changed in the last two years. It seemed to start with a bolt of lightning and then the emergence of a masked hero, who had turned out to be her best friend. Finding out about the Flash had led to the discovery that metahumans existed, and that a speedster from the future was responsible for the way their lives were now. It had taken her the better part of the last year to move on from Eddie sacrificing his own life to be the hero who took down the Reverse Flash. And during that year, another speedster had shown up. This one more evil than Eobard Thawne. Not to mention watching Barry defeat Zoom, and then finding out he could and had time travelled. Now she'd found out aliens existed. Honestly, it was enough to make even an inquisitive journalist like herself wish for a simple life. Which is why she was here, rather than in her own apartment. She didn't want to be alone. It was almost dinnertime, which meant Wally and her dad would be home soon. Iris' stomach grumbled, effectively interrupting her thoughts, and she made her way to the kitchen to find something to eat.

As she passed the dining room table, she couldn't miss the three envelopes propped up against the centerpiece with Barry's unmistakable scrawl. One was addressed to her dad, one to Wally and one to her. She moved over to the table, picked up the one with her name on it and instantly a chill ran up her spine. A part of her didn't want to know what was inside, because with everything going on in their world and the fact that her boyfriend had left three letters, she had a feeling that Barry didn't expect a happy outcome to the Dominator situation. But she knew herself well enough to know that her curiosity would eventually get the better of her. It was easier to give in now than spend countless hours debating the issue. Changing her mind about the kitchen and food, she walked over to the couch and sat down.

She held the envelope in her hand, staring at it, willing the contents not to spell gloom and doom but promises of something happier. Somehow her gut was telling her that it wasn't going to be the latter. She knew Barry better than she knew anyone else and would bet good money that this was going to be a goodbye letter. It would be just like him to make sure he got in the last word, so he wrote these letters as a part of some contingency plan. Maybe she shouldn't read it. Maybe it would be better to wait until the whole thing was over. Then she could just give him the unread letter back.

But she was a reporter and curiosity was her curse. She had to know what was inside. Spying a letter opener on the coffee table, she used it to open the envelope and then pulled out the folded paper inside. Sitting back, she tucked strands of hair behind her ear and unfolded the letter. She took a deep breath and began reading the contents.

 _My dearest Iris,_

 _I know as you read this you're already wondering why I'm writing a letter to you, and why there were also letters for Wally and Joe. I would bet a week's pay that you probably had a moment's hesitation about reading it. But I also know how curious you are and that nothing would stop you from discovering what it is that I need to tell you. I wouldn't put it past you to believe that this was my way out of saying goodbye, just in case I don't get a chance to tell you in person. You'd be right. Though, when you finish reading this, I have no doubt you'll wish I was in front of you so you could yell at me for doing something stupid. Because while I know in my heart I'm doing the right thing, you, Iris West, would want to smack some sense into me. Well, you wouldn't be the first person to try and talk me out of my decision. Oliver beat you to it. While he didn't come out and physically try to stop me, he did try to talk me out of it._

 _The thing is, I don't see my decision as doing something stupid, or even brave, it's simply the only choice that can be made. I also know you'll think that by putting my thoughts on paper I'm taking the coward's way out, but the truth is, if I told you this in person, I wouldn't be able to go through with what I need to do. Oliver couldn't change my mind about this, but you would be a different story. I'd never be able to leave you, not again, and too much is at stake, so this letter was my best option._

 _There's no getting away from the fact that I've made some big mistakes in my life. My first error was never telling you how much I loved you. I allowed you to believe you were no more than the best friend a guy could ever have. That wasn't fair to you or me. I was too afraid of losing you as a friend so I took the easy route, keeping you as close as I could while hiding my true feelings for you. I had the chance to go back in time to save my mom, with everyone supporting my choice to do so, but in the end, I chose the life I'd made with you and Joe instead. This I don't see as a mistake at all, I see it as one of the smartest moves I ever made. But then, a year later, I made the decision of going back to change my life so that both my parents would be alive, but I lost what I had with you. I almost lost that for good when memories of that new life started erasing this life. So I decided to set things back on track, only to find out that even by doing that, you can't put things back exactly as they were._

 _I will have to live with the choices I made. But even through all of that, you still believed in me, you have always stood by me. You are my home, Iris, without you I'd be lost._

 _You never truly held it against me that I didn't tell you I had super speed after I woke up from the coma. I know you were mad, and to this day it probably still bothers you that I kept that secret from you for months. Another mistake I must apologize for, but at the same time, I admit I secretly enjoyed hiding behind the mask with you. I was a little bolder around you, something I didn't have the courage to be without the mask. Even so, I am sorry I kept that from you. Up to the time the lightning struck I shared almost everything with you, but then I woke up from the coma and kept the most life-changing event to ever happen to me from you. Yet you forgave me. You always forgive me._

 _Loving you, knowing that you love me the same way is something that will stay with me forever, and is far more important to me than being the Flash._

 _Now I must make the ultimate sacrifice to save you, to give you and all the humans and metahumans on this Earth a chance to live. And you have to promise me, Iris, that you will live your life and find happiness, because that's all I have ever wanted for you. You deserve to be happy. It took going back in time to realize that you were my happiness all along. You, Joe, Wally, Cisco, Caitlyn, you're my family, and I let you all down. But now I can make amends for the mistakes I've made._

 _Turns out that losing sight of what was right in front of me is what brought the Dominators here. I messed with time, and now I must pay for that choice. The Dominators made a deal with the Government. I turn myself over and they'll leave our world alone. It seems I apparently broke some old truce we had with them when I altered the timeline. Even back in the fifties they didn't trust metahumans, but we were a minority back then. However, if I surrender to them, humans and metahumans alike will be safe._

 _This isn't something I do lightly. Leaving you and what we've only just started to build together is the hardest thing about this decision. But your safety is more important than anything else. Yours and everyone else's._

 _I love you, Iris West. I always have and always will. You are the one I gave my heart to years ago. You're my home._

 _With all my love,_

 _Barry_

Iris stared at the paper clutched in her hand as tears gently fell down her face. She had no idea how long ago Barry had written the letter. Now it was probably too late to find him, drag him to the pipeline and lock him in the same cell they'd put him in back when Zoom had challenged him to a race. She angrily wiped at the wet streaks on her cheeks. He was gone, and all she had to remember him by was a piece of paper. Stupid was right. And apparently, Oliver Queen had attempted to talk him out of surrendering to a group of evil world-dominating aliens, but to no avail. Did he really think that all the good he'd done could be so easily erased because of a few mistakes. Everyone slips up, but only her big-hearted Barry would think that all the evil in the world was his fault. This was his way of fixing things that really were just a matter of fate.

She looked at the words on the paper again. This wasn't just a piece of paper. This was all she had left of the man she loved. She re-read the last line again, before clutching the letter to her chest like a lifeline and let the tears of loss stream down.

She didn't know how long she sat there, but the ringing of her cell phone pulled her back to reality. She looked down at the caller ID and taking a deep breath hit the green accept. "Hey, Dad." She hoped she sounded more cheerful than she felt. She didn't know what her dad knew at this point and didn't feel like voicing their loss if he didn't know about Barry's sacrifice yet.

"I called to tell you, it's over. Cisco just contacted me to tell me that the Dominators are gone." Her dad sounded excited. He couldn't possibly know that it was Barry's surrender that had sent them away.

She turned on the TV, hoping to see what, if any, destruction had occurred. "That…that's great."

"Yeah, I wanted to let you know that Barry and the entire team of heroes are waiting for the arrival of the President who's coming to thank them all in person." She could hear the excitement in her dad's voice. "I thought maybe you'd want to come down and see it for yourself, though I've been told that with so many high-ranking officials in attendance, outsiders like us probably won't be let within a hundred yards of that hangar."

All of a sudden, Iris' mind zeroed in on one specific part of her dad's news. "Did you say _Barry_ and everyone?"

"Yep, Barry, Oliver, John Diggle, Professor Stein, Jax, Supergirl…do I really have to recite the list?"

Iris stared unblinking at the images on the TV screen. Sure enough, there was the Flash, or at least his yellow lightning streak, running around attacking the Dominators, along with the Green Arrow, Supergirl, Heat Wave, Citizen Steel, and the Atom. "You did say Barry, he's there, right now, he's…."

"Baby, Barry's fine. They all are." Suddenly there was a pause, "Iris, are you okay? I mean I know that things could have gone differently…"

Iris looked down at the letter she held, and then back to the TV screen. "You have no idea, Dad. Tell everyone congratulations. I probably need to get over to CCPN and start working on my article."

"Okay, I'll pass it along. Are you sure you're okay?" Her dad's concern couldn't be masked over the phone.

"Oh, yeah, better than you can imagine. I'm glad this is over. Love you, Dad. I'll talk to you tomorrow." She waited for him to respond in kind and then disconnected. She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. Barry was still here. He wasn't in outer space. He wasn't a prisoner of evil world-dominating aliens.

She stood up and, folding the letter, went and retrieved her coat. She quickly put it back on and then slipped the letter in her pocket. She knew it would be hours until she would be able to have any alone time with the love of her life, so she'd do what she had told her dad she was going to do. She was going to head to the newspaper office. She'd call Cisco and Caitlyn and get the low down on what happened, write her story, and then she would find her boyfriend and give him a very large piece of her mind, before hugging him and then not letting him out of her sight for a very, very long time.


	4. Chapter 2: Joe

**Chapter 2: Joe**

Joe entered his home, closed the door and took in the peace and quiet. He closed his eyes and just listened to the sound of nothing in particular. Taking a deep breath, he opened his eyes and glanced around the room, before focusing on the pictures that adorned the mantel. Images of his family, two sons with super speed and a daughter who was too inquisitive for her own good smiled back at him. He loved each of them, even if they were the reason he was going to have an ulcer before the year was out.

After hanging up his coat he made his way over towards the couch. Wally wasn't home yet, hopefully he was working on a school project and not hanging out at the lab, trying to get a handle on his speed. Iris was at the paper working on the biggest story Central City had had in a long time. And his other son was partying with a vigilante, an alien with super powers, an ex-criminal, though he had strong doubts about the _ex_ part, a man who could turn himself into steel, a billionaire who liked to fly…and the list went on.

He was proud of his kids, and the amazing people they'd grown up to be, but that didn't make him worry any less. Barry carried the weight of the world on his shoulders and Iris wanted to make the world better. When his daughter wasn't hanging around S.T.A.R. Labs, she was out tracking down leads on stories that had people shooting at her. And then there was Wally, who wanted to be just like the Flash and save the world, but unlike Barry, his youngest son seemed to want to run head first into danger and not use any restraint.

When did his life get so out of control? It used to be so simple. Go out every day, hunt down plain old criminals who robbed banks and then bring the bad guys to justice. But now, now there were metahumans, aliens, speedsters from the future, and speedsters who claimed they were Gods. To top that there was universe upon universe of other Earths with individuals who shared the faces of people he'd known all his life. He missed the days when the only thing he had to worry about was whether Barry was in his room and not running off to try and see Henry at Iron Heights. He'd take jumping in his car and dragging the young boy home, kicking and screaming, over worrying about his son boarding an alien spacecraft that would take him so far away that he would have no way of bringing the boy back.

He rubbed a hand over his tired eyes. When Joe had called Iris earlier, he'd left out a big part of what Cisco had told him. The young scientist, in his excitement to share the whole story, had gone on and on and let it slip that Barry had almost turned himself over to the aliens, as part of some deal the Government had made. Cisco had said that the speedster had only changed his mind when Oliver and the group had banded together and showed his son that it was better to work as a team and fight rather than sacrifice one person for the good of many. Noble sacrifice or not, Barry not being in their lives would leave a big hole. He may have whole-heartedly agreed that it was time for his oldest son to move out on his own again, but Joe didn't want to think about not seeing his son every day. The young man had so much heart, the world would be lost without him. And Iris, he didn't even want to think about what it would do to her. Man, he really missed the simple days, days when he'd come home and find two young children sitting at the dining room table doing their homework.

He glanced over towards the room where so many dinners had been shared, and his trained detective eyes caught sight of two envelopes that he was sure hadn't been there before. Hastily he stood up from the couch and then made his way towards the table. He quickly recognized his older son's handwriting, and wondered just what Barry had done now. Picking up the one addressed to him, he sat down on one of the dining room chairs and opened the envelope. His hands trembled slightly as he pulled out the paper inside and began to read.

 _Joe,_

 _Since I probably won't ever get a chance to talk to you again in person, there is one thing that I need to say, before anything else, and that is Thank You._

 _That's something I don't think I have ever truly taken the opportunity to tell you, at least, not the way you deserve to hear it anyway. I hope you know by now, and while it may have taken me a long time to realize it, you are the best dad any kid would be lucky to have, and I was very lucky to be one of those kids. You took in a boy who had experienced the unspeakable trauma of seeing his mom murdered by the unexplained and never gave up on him. You may not have always believed in what I saw, but you still showed me love and understanding. You chased after me every time I ran, even if I was just trying to go see my dad at Iron Heights. You must have lost a lot of sleep back then, especially since you stayed by my bed each night till I feel asleep. Though, with my duties as the Flash, you probably still lose sleep every night. But no matter what, you loved me like I was your own son, and that is something a simple Thank You isn't enough to cover._

 _It doesn't matter whether it's love or blood that ties you to us, but Iris, Wally and myself are the luckiest kids in the world to have a dad like you._

 _Everything I am today, is because of you. You gave a scared little boy a home, a family, love._

 _I am turning myself over to the Dominators so that everyone will be safe, not just the ones I love, but everyone I swore to protect when I started being the Flash. I don't see any other choice, I created this mess and it's my responsibility to clean it up. I just ask one thing of you now, Joe, don't hold Wally back. Give him the support you have given me over the last two years, because I am passing the title of Central City's guardian over to him. He needs to know that you believe in him. If not, he'll either falter or he may seek support from someone else, and that person might not have his best interests at heart, not like you do._

 _I know it's not the best advice, at least, nothing close to good old Joe West advice, but it's the best I've got. Don't let Iris and Wally slip away, no matter how many disagreements you guys may have. You are better together, as a family. You've always been there for Iris and me and you've been there for Wally since you found about him and he became a part of our family._

 _We've all made choices, that, right or wrong, we did because we thought it was the right choice at the time. One of the best things I learned from you was that you can get through anything when you have good people to support and love you. Never stop being there for them._

 _It doesn't seem quite enough, but thank you, Joe, for everything._

 _I love you, Dad._

 _Your son,_

 _Barry_

Joe stared at the letter, letting the tears well in his eyes. It seemed no matter what Barry did there was always one more thing that made you love the young man more. It almost broke his heart to know that he might never have gotten a chance to hold his son again. It was bad enough watching Barry get beaten so badly by metahuman after metahuman, even to the point that he had been paralyzed for days, but at least he was still with them. The thought that aliens might have taken him away from them forever, and done God knows what to the speedster, sent a chill down his spine.

When he'd first learned from Cisco that Oliver and the group had talked Barry out of turning himself over to the Dominators, it hadn't seemed real. Joe had just chalked it up to another notch in the crazy world they were living in. But after reading his son's goodbye letter, it wasn't something to take lightly at all. In fact, it scared the hell out of him to realize just how easily he could lose his son. But he knew Barry and it was just who the young man was. He wouldn't hesitate to sacrifice himself, regardless of the reason, if it meant saving even one person. And he knew that his youngest son was the exact same way.

Hearing the key in the lock, he continued to stare at the letter. He was pretty sure it was Wally finally returning home, but he didn't have the heart to look up when the door opened. Joe almost hoped it would be Barry, so that he could hug the man, tell him how proud he was of the speedster and then slap a pair of power-dampening cuffs on him and lock him up somewhere for the next ten years.


	5. Chapter 3 - Wally

**Chapter 3: Wally**

Wally stuffed his keys in his jacket pocket, and before he'd managed to remove his arms from the sleeves, he caught sight of his dad sitting in the dining room. One look at the older man's posture, set the young man instantly on alert.

He quickly, but slow by speedster standards, walked into the living room and watched his dad turn towards him, wiping tears from his eyes. From the look on Joe's face, they weren't happy tears either. Wally immediately became concerned and confused at the same time. Caitlyn had told H.R. and him at the lab that Barry and the team of heroes had won, so why did his dad look like he'd just lost someone important to him.

"Dad, what's wrong? I thought the heroes saved the day, without any casualties." Then a sinking feeling crept into the pit of his stomach. "Is it Iris? Did something happen to Iris?" He asked, closing the distance between him and his father.

Joe wiped his hand over his face and took a deep breath, shaking his head. "No, everyone's fine. Iris is fine. Barry, thank goodness, is fine."

"Did Barry get hurt? Caitlyn didn't mention anything, she just said we'd won."

"No, Barry didn't get hurt. But apparently, before the big battle, he was going to turn himself over to the Dominators because he thought that was the only way to save the world." The older man picked up an envelope and handed it to his youngest son. "He was so convinced he'd never see any of us again that he wrote a couple of goodbye letters, and in the excitement of saving the day probably forgot all about them."

Wally took the item from Joe, but kept his eyes on his father. "Why would he have even considered turning himself over to a group of evil space creatures?"

"Apparently a government representative made a deal with the aliens. Seems they were threatened by Barry's ability to alter time, and because of Flashpoint they saw him as too much of a liability to the Universe as a whole. If Barry had turned himself in, then the Dominators would have left in peace and not tried to kill all the metahumans and countless other innocent people. Fortunately for us, Oliver and the team stopped Barry from doing something stupid." Joe got up from his seat. "I'm not sure if I want to hug Barry or lock him in the pipeline right now." He reached out and put his hand on his son's shoulder. "It's been a long couple of days. I'm heading to bed. Goodnight, son."

"Night, Dad." Wally watched his father head upstairs, put the letter from Barry on the table, removed his jacket and hung it on the back of a dining room chair. He then went into the kitchen to get a bite to eat. He'd worked up quite an appetite over the last few hours running in the speed room, doing laps with H.R. timing him and suggesting new training techniques.

He made quick work of putting together a triple-decker sandwich before returning to the dining room to sit down and eat. Taking a bite of his food, he opened the envelope and pulled out the paper. He could eat and read at the same time, and while he could do both quite fast, he decided this situation called for a somewhat slower pace.

 _Wally,_

 _I know we didn't actually get off on the right foot when you first came into our family. However, now that you know my secret, I'm sure you realize it had nothing to do with you. Between Zoom and alternate Earths, I had a lot on my mind. Sometimes, I don't do very well with multi-tasking. Funny when you think about the fact that I can read and process information in seconds. Occasionally, I have a bad habit of focusing on one main problem and letting it consume almost all of my attention._

 _You probably feel like I'm still standing in your way, not encouraging you to reach your full potential. It's not that I don't have faith in you, or that Joe and Iris don't, it's just that being a superhero is not all fun and games. It's a huge responsibility. There are strong life lessons that come with being a superhero with powers. There's a lot of heartache, pain and a loss of innocence that I'm trying to protect you from. Joe and Iris are too. We don't want you to lose the positive attitude you have. The superhero life is a big responsibility, but it's a one that I know you can handle._

 _It's why I now pass the torch to you. You are going to be the guardian of Central City. I wish I could be here to help train you, to teach you all the neat tricks I've learned over the last two years, things like phasing and throwing lightning, but my destiny now lies somewhere else (apparently somewhere far out in space). But I have faith in you. You're already faster than I was at the same stage of having my powers. I bet you'll be able to develop these skills on your own. However, I'm sure Cisco and Caitlyn can probably get Harry to come help you, or maybe even reach out to Jay Garrick from Earth 3. All you need to do is ask._

 _I'm sure that in no time at all you and Iris will become the crime fighting brother-sister team you were in Flashpoint, but you'll also have a lot of tech support you didn't have in that timeline. But, no matter what, I'm sure you'll both end up giving Joe a lot more gray hair than he has now._

 _Be safe, be smart, and listen to Cisco and Caitlyn. Never be afraid to ask for help. It doesn't make you weak, it actually makes you stronger to have support. I urge you to listen to advice that is given to you, whether asked for or not. The one giving the advice is usually right. Remember too, that Iris and Joe have your best interests at heart. They aren't trying to hold you back, it's just that you're so excited about your powers that you want to run into every situation and use your speed. Having speed isn't everything. You need to slow down, too. The Green Arrow once gave me the best advice, (his methods may have been a little extreme, but the intent was there), you have the time, so make sure you assess every situation before you run head first into it. If you don't, you just may end up with two arrows in your back, or a bomb strapped to your wrist. (I speak from experience)._

 _You came into our life in a whirlwind, and I was lucky enough to gain a brother, not just at home, but in the speed force, too. I'm glad to have gotten to know you, Wally. Take care of Joe, Iris and our city._

 _Your brother,_

 _Barry_

Wally stared at the letter and then back at his half-eaten sandwich. Suddenly he didn't feel much like eating. Joe hadn't been exaggerating; Barry really had planned on turning himself over to the Dominators. He had always had doubts about the young man his father had raised alongside Iris in this house. There had been many months, and even now, to some degree, where he'd felt like he'd been playing second fiddle to the bright superstar. Especially now that he had his own set of powers. But reading Barry's words, he realized it wasn't that no one wanted him to have speed, it was more a matter of them wanting to keep him safe, and learn to be responsible.

Up until now, he had seriously begun doubting himself, and his abilities. He couldn't understand why no one seemed to want to take the time to help him, or even let him assist Barry in taking down the alien invaders. He had to admit that Iris had been right; he didn't have the experience like the others on the hero team. But how was he supposed to gain experience if all he was allowed to do was run around the speed room at S.T.A.R. Labs and have Caitlyn run even more tests on him. Now, with Barry still around and not a prisoner of aliens thousands of miles away from Earth, his hopes started to rise. Maybe, he'd finally get to learn cool speedster tricks and start gaining some experience.

He re-read the last line of the letter. While his brother's words had been written because Barry didn't think he'd ever get a chance to say these things in person, Wally was thankful that the speedster hadn't collected the notes before they could be read. With the crisis over, he briefly wondered if Barry had even remembered their existence. It was nice to know how the young man felt. He had started looking up to the speedster like an older brother and it had hurt when neither the Flash, nor anyone else for that matter, seemed to want to help him get a handle on his new abilities.

While Joe was all about hugs and affection, Wally had discovered Barry wasn't always easy to read, he took on so many of the city's problems that he tended to shut people out. He realized now that his brother was probably trying to protect himself as well as those around him. The young speedster thought back to the incident with the walking-talking shark. He'd called Barry a coward back then, and little had he known that his new brother was anything but. He'd learned later that the Flash had taken quite a beating outside the West house. Then to learn about other Earths and Zoom, well it was no wonder Barry had seemed distant back then.

The young speedster realized, too, he was jealous of Barry. Wally had missed out on years of getting to know both Joe and Iris, being part of shared family times, vacations, adventures, things Barry had been there for. Then to find out that Barry was the Flash, being able to go fast enough to break the sound barrier, it had been a bit overwhelming, especially since it was something Wally himself had coveted. But now he too had the ability to go faster than all the cars he'd ever raced in his life, and it seemed like everyone wanted to hold him back.

He didn't want to be held back anymore. He was going to work with H.R., even if, despite what Barry had written in the letter, no one else would help train him. He was going to emulate the type of hero his big brother was and use his speed for good, to help others. And, he'd think seriously about slowing down, once he got a better handle on things. Picking up his sandwich, he took another bite, and leaned back. He may not be the sole guardian of Central City, but it was going to be fun being part of a speedster team.


	6. Chapter 4 - Caitlyn

**Chapter 4: Caitlyn**

Caitlyn had just finished swiping her card on the door entry and entered the main lobby of her apartment complex when her phone buzzed. Pulling it from her pocket, she quickly hit the accept call button. "Hey Cisco, sorry I missed the party, but I had to take Dr. Stein's daughter, Lily, home. I bet it was fun to be able to relax and chat with all the heroes."

"Yeah it was cool hanging with everyone, celebrating a huge win against aliens. Not every day you can say that is it?" Cisco replied over the line. "You should have brought Lily to the festivities. I bet she would have loved to have met her dad's time-travelling team."

Caitlyn made her way over to the elevators, and shook her head. "Not such a good idea, actually, since apparently the team doesn't know that Lily even exists."

"What do you mean they don't know she exists?" She could almost see her friend's face as Cisco sighed over the phone. "Let me guess, another present courtesy of Flashpoint?"

"No, for a change, Flashpoint is not responsible for her existence." The brunette pushed the button for her floor and waited for the doors to close. "Turns out Dr. Stein met his younger self back in the late 80's, and told the young Dr. Stein to stop neglecting his wife. The young man took the suggestion to heart and poof, our Dr. Stein came back to the present to meet a daughter he never even knew he had."

"Wow, at least his change had a positive effect."

"It's great he has a daughter, but who knows what other effects are a result of her existence." The elevator doors opened and Caitlyn walked out onto her floor. "When he first told me about it, he was talking about going back to fix his error. He called her an aberration. But I don't think he'll go back now and change anything."

"Why not?"

Caitlyn dug her keys out of her pocket and began unlocking her apartment door. "Well for one thing, he got to work with her and know her, plus he told me that he's been getting sporadic memories of her. These memories just keep popping into his head. It's almost like time itself wants to keep him from erasing her." She entered her home and closed and locked the door behind her. "But aside from his new memories, if he were to go back and somehow not have that conversation with his younger self, then our present might be affected in a big way. Lily was instrumental in making that little device that Barry and Kara placed on all the Dominators before they took off."

"Just another example of what Barry kept telling me when I begged him to go back and save Dante. Time travel has consequences."

The brunette removed her coat and hung it in her closet. "Please tell me that you were at least cordial to Barry at the party. You're going to have to forgive him one of these days, Cisco. He isn't responsible for Dante not being in your life anymore. At least not directly. He's Barry, and you know he'd do anything for you. For any of us. He gave up his job at CCPD so that Julian wouldn't turn me in. If that doesn't prove to you what a true friend he is, I don't know what will."

"You don't have to worry, Caitlyn. I've come to terms with what happened and have forgiven him."

"It's about time." Caitlyn lips spread into a genuinely happy smile. "What made you have a change of heart? Was it because he was going to turn himself over to the Dominators to save all us metahumans?"

"No, actually, it wasn't that. And I'd like to think my forgiving him had a hand in keeping him from being so selfless and dumb. But it turns out that travelling through time is not as cool as I always dreamed it would be."

"That doesn't sound good." Caitlyn sat down on her couch. "Didn't you enjoy your own venture into the past?"

"Yes, and no. Spent most of it on the timeship. Don't get me wrong, the Waverider is totally awesome, and Felicity and I did get to play hero, saving Heat Wave, Nate and Amaya, but I also got to experience, firsthand, the results of what travelling through time can do to the present."

She heard the pain behind her friend's words. "What do you mean, Cisco? What did you do?"

"Well as you know, we went back to 1951 with the intent of questioning a Dominator. Mick caught one but before the team could get anything out of him, the alien and the team were taken by a young Agent Smith and his government cronies. After Felicity and I got there and rescued Mick and everyone, we decided we couldn't let the Government torture the alien, and figured if we showed him we were good guys, maybe, in the present they'd be forgiving and leave the Earth alone."

"Well since the Dominators decided to invade all over the world, I'm guessing it didn't go as planned?" Caitlyn silently drummed her fingers on the arm of her couch as she listened to her friend.

"When we got back to the present the one we had rescued contacted us using a device I kind of stole from his ship, and told us that Barry needed to surrender himself to them. Once we found out the exact details, Nate and I contacted our friend again, and found out that because we let the alien go, and showed proof of more metahumans than before..."

Caitlyn closed her eyes. "They decided we all needed to be exterminated, anyway. Something tells me that even if Barry had gone through with the deal Agent Smith made, they probably wouldn't have been satisfied with just Barry, right?"

"I guess, but who knows." The brunette could almost see her friend shrugging his shoulders. "They did drop the big bomb which if Firestorm hadn't pulled off the coolest trick ever, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now. But then again, we didn't give Barry the chance to surrender, so we have no way of knowing if his sacrifice would have been enough. After my second conversation with the Dominator, I realized when you make one change in the past, it ripples forward in unseen ways. The choice we made to set the Dominator free put everything into perspective, and I suddenly knew exactly how Barry's been feeling for the past two months."

"Well I'm glad you finally forgave him. Did you two have a chance to talk and clear the air at least?" Caitlyn kicked off her shoes and, picking them up, rose from the couch to make her way to the bedroom to get changed for the night.

"Yeah, we're good."

"Good. We all have too much history together. We're a family, and we can't be an effective team and defeat Savitar and this Dr. Alchemy if we're holding grudges." She dropped her shoes inside her bedroom door and made her way over to her dresser. "So did you get to meet the President?"

"Yeah, briefly. I could have stood up on the stage with everyone, Barry tried hard to convince me to, but I didn't feel like much of a hero, so I declined."

"Cisco…"

"No, really. It's not because of what happened in the past. I didn't really do anything other than be part of the support team. I might have vibed onto an alien ship…twice. Once to see what happened to Oliver and company, and the second to talk to an alien. And I did get to be a passenger on a timeship and fixed an alien spaceship, but that's really all I did. It's not like I used my sonic powers to take down aliens."

Caitlyn wished she could reach through the phone and give her friend a big hug. He sounded like he could really use one about now.

"Well, I just wanted to make sure you got home okay, wasn't sure how the city was faring with aliens having been on the loose. I need to text Barry, see if my interdimensional extrapolator worked and that Kara made it back to her Earth okay. See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow, Cisco. And don't be too hard on yourself – we won. The aliens are gone, and Team Flash is whole once again." Caitlyn pulled a pair of pajamas from her drawer, and suddenly remembered the note about Lily she'd put in her coat pocket. She'd written down some of the things about the young scientist that she'd learned, just in case Dr. Stein did go back and correct the past. She just felt the need to keep the young woman in her memory somehow.

"I know, you're right. Night, Caitlyn."

"Night, Cisco." Hanging up, she put her phone on her dresser, before walking back to her coat closet. As she reached for the doorknob, she noticed the envelope on the floor in her entryway. She'd been too preoccupied with her phone conversation when she'd arrived home that she'd missed it when she'd first entered. As she picked it up, she couldn't miss Barry's unmistakable handwriting. Knowing what he'd been about to do, she had a suspicion that this had been his way of saying goodbye. She knew the speedster well enough to know that while fast, he wouldn't have had time to express what he'd wanted to say in person before going off into space with aliens from another planet.

She debated not opening it, after all Barry was safe here in good old Central City, and not out among the stars, and probably would have come to collect it if he'd thought about it. She briefly wondered who he'd left letters for, and had a feeling that the events of the evening had kept him from thinking about them.

As she made her way back to her bedroom, the urge to see what her friend could have said to her was just too overwhelming. She sat down on the edge of her bed, gently pulled apart the seam along the fold and took out the letter.

 _Caitlyn,_

 _I know you now have these powers that scare you. That you think they make you cold. But you are one of the warmest, most loving people I know. I think, instead of reversing your cold powers, there's a way for you to turn them into something good. Just remember the love in your heart._

 _Remember that movie night when you won the toss and made Cisco and I sit through Frozen. In the movie it was Ana, stepping in front of the Prince's sword which ended up being the ultimate act of true love, saving Elsa. How it made Elsa realize that it was love that could bring back the spring. You can do that too, Cait, I have faith in you. Don't lose faith in yourself. Keep hold of the love you have inside, let that be your guide._

 _You once told me that you and Ronnie were like fire and ice. Little did you know how true that would turn out to be. Ronnie may be gone and after what happened with Hunter, you feel like your heart will never warm up to another person again. That can't be further from the truth. In my heart, I know there's someone else out there for you, someone who will warm you up again._

 _The team is there for you, especially Cisco. You and Cisco, you were a team long before Team Flash came into being. Don't lose sight of that. Be there for each other. Lean on each other and be each other's anchors._

 _I also don't think I've ever thanked you, at least not enough. You've been there for me from the start. You kept watch over me while I was in the coma. You've fixed every broken bone, cleaned up all my scrapes and cuts, and even burns. Thank you for all of it. Thank you for standing by me even when I make stupidly bad decisions (we won't get into all the times you told me to not have clandestine meetings with Iris before she knew I was the Flash)._

 _Thank you for being the voice of reason on the team, for being the best darn doctor and friend any speedster could ask for._

 _Promise me you'll keep the warmth in your heart, don't give up hope on happiness._

 _Thank you for everything._

 _Love, your friend,  
Barry_

Caitlyn sighed. While she appreciated Barry's thoughts, she didn't believe she would find love again. In fact finding love now scared her. She believed that Ronnie was her soulmate and he was now gone. Then she'd fallen for Jay, who ended up being the psychopathic Hunter Zoloman hell bent on destroying a multiverse of Earths. She couldn't trust her heart, not any more.

Caitlyn glanced at the blue light on the power dampening cuffs adorning her wrists. She hated the fact that she had to wear them, but it was necessary. Without them, the evil of the cold powers coursing through her was too strong a pull. She knew Barry meant well in the letter, but he didn't know how scary it was to sit idly by while a harsher, colder version of herself took over. She still remembered all the terrible things she'd said to Barry at that warehouse, and how because of them Cisco had spent the last two weeks giving their friend the cold shoulder all because of these powers that she didn't want.

She shivered at the thought of what might have happened if Barry hadn't been able to warm her cold heart in the pipeline last week when Killer Frost had come to the surface. She could still feel the frozen icicle she created with her own hands, ready to pierce the speedster's heart. But the look of trust in Barry's eyes, as he stood there daring her to kill him, had helped bring her true self back. She had known, deep down, he had only done what he did to prove to her that she wasn't the cold-hearted killer she was afraid of becoming.

She was extremely glad, now, that Barry hadn't gone into space. She had a feeling she was going to need the speedster more than ever in the future, both him and Cisco. Their support was going to be the thing that kept her from crossing back to the dark side. She smiled to herself, knowing how much ribbing she'd get if her friends knew she'd just compared herself to a Jedi knight.

Suddenly getting the urge to feel warm, she decided she'd take a shower before heading to bed. Picking up the pajamas she'd taken out earlier, she placed the letter from Barry on her dresser and then headed for her bathroom. Who knew what the future held. Maybe it did hold love and warmth for her, and thanks to the Dominators metahuman bomb being destroyed, she'd have a chance to find out.


	7. Chapter 5 - Cisco

**Chapter 5: Cisco**

Cisco walked into his workstation at S.T.A.R. Labs with a smile on his face. Barry had returned his text, letting him know that the mini extrapolator he'd made for Kara had worked. At least it had opened a portal. They had no idea if she had actually made it back to her Earth. He had to assume she had, if not he'd probably have gotten an interdimensional alert from her and he would have had to try and vibe to where she was to get her back to her Earth. He smiled as he walked over to one of his tables of tools and picked up a half-completed device. Too bad they couldn't mass produce the interdimensional extrapolator, they could make a fortune; but he had a feeling that mass production of something that could allow just anyone to cross dimensions would have dangerous repercussions.

He briefly considered sending out a signal to see if she responded, but he would have to make his way to the Cortex to do that. He wanted to get his work room put together somewhat first. As he fiddled with the device in his hand, he couldn't help but think about how much had changed in the last few days. He'd experienced a true whirlwind of cool and exciting things, as well as having a few eye-opening revelations. Finding out that Barry had jumped to another Earth earlier that year, and never bothered to tell him or anyone, had initially added one more item on the list of things that Cisco was mad at his friend for.

Getting to breach her Earth and then actually meeting the super cool Kryptonian, even if it had taken three tries to actually make it there, had been quite awesome. It might have been cooler if they weren't trying to recruit Kara to help with world dominating aliens so that he could have had a chance to explore her world some. Maybe another time when Earth 1 wasn't in dire peril.

Truth be told, Cisco was in geek heaven. Aside from meeting Kara, and going to her Earth and creating a mini portal device, getting to go on the Waverider and travel back in time had been epic. Epic that is, until the point where he had almost been responsible for the deaths of every metahuman and countless non-metas. It was definitely one of the coolest but eye-opening experiences of the last two days. He had finally come to realize exactly how Barry had been feeling since his return to this timeline. Cisco realized that Dante's death had hit him so hard because he'd never have a chance to finally work on that closer relationship with his brother they had both wanted. He'd needed someone to blame and Barry seemed like the right target for all his hurt and anger.

However, Cisco didn't think he could have lived with himself if Barry had turned himself over to the Dominators. Especially if the speedster had still been under the impression that he was Vibe's public enemy number one. He'd almost lost a best friend, someone he had considered more of a brother than his brother by blood.

Now that things were back on track for him and Barry, Cisco was a little bummed that the speedster had decided to stay at S.T.A.R. Labs tonight rather than crashing with him; he had been kind of looking forward to a home-cooked breakfast. But, he understood. While he was glad that he and Barry had cleared the air, his friend probably needed some alone time to decompress from the events of the last few days. Plus, as team leader, Barry had wanted to see everyone off as they made their way back to their own homes, or ships, or Earths as the case may be.

As he put the device into a drawer, he thought back to the discussion he'd had with Barry during the celebration party, after he'd given Kara the completed extrapolator to get her home.

They'd shared a laugh at Mick's strange flirtation with Supergirl. Kara's expression had been priceless. While Oliver, Barry and Cisco all knew the blonde could more than take care of herself, each one of them had stepped up and offered, in a brotherly capacity, to set the hot-head straight.

Kara had laughed, and thanked them all but said it was okay. That if he tried anything, she'd just use her freeze breath on him. She then went over to talk to Felicity, and Oliver had joined her, leaving Cisco and Barry alone.

Barry had been first to break the sudden awkward silence by asking if they were now okay.

Cisco had replied that yeah, they were good. And he had apologized for his less than friendly manner ever since Caitlyn had coldly spilled the beans about Dante not being dead in the other version of this timeline.

Barry had stated that he understood, that what he'd done was selfish but he hadn't meant it to be. He'd just felt so broken between his dad and the real Jay Garrick being his dad's doppelganger, he just hadn't been thinking straight. He'd acted on pain and impulse and now had to pay the price for that mistake.

Cisco had put a hand on his friend's shoulder and told him that he now empathized with what Barry had gone through. He'd explained that while it still hurt that Dante was gone, he couldn't hold it against the speedster anymore. While it had stung quite a bit to know, after all of Barry's arguments about not going back to save Dante, he had turned around and done the very thing he'd been adamant about doing just to save his own parents. But he could now comprehend exactly what Barry had meant about the consequences of changing even one event in the past. Having had a chance to travel in time himself, he now had firsthand experience of how altering the past could change the present. That, at the time, it had seemed like a good idea to free the Dominator the Legends had helped capture, they had ended up being partially to blame for what could have caused the deaths of millions, and he had almost lost one of his best friends.

Cisco had watched the smile slowly spread over Barry's face at his declaration that the speedster was still his best friend, and reciprocated in kind. Deciding it was time to change the subject, he'd asked his best friend if he was worried at all about the fact that the Government, or at least a faction of it, knew his true identity.

Barry had just shrugged and stated that they needed to deal with one crisis at a time. Now that the threat of the Dominators was over, they needed to get back to worrying about Alchemy and Savitar. He had then put his arm around Cisco's shoulders and guided him over to the rest of the team of superheroes so that they both could enjoy the rest of the evening's celebrations.

Cisco put the excess items he had used for the mini extrapolator into a side drawer in his workstation. He didn't want someone like H.R. to come across them. Not that he felt the man would know what to do with them if he did find them, but he wasn't taking any chances. H.R. was too much of a wild card.

Wanting to send that message to Kara and check the Cortex computers for any alerts that might have come in while they had been celebrating, he began heading out of his lab. As he turned, his eyes quickly caught sight of the white envelope leaning against his keyboard. Changing direction, he walked over to the computer and noticed his name written in Barry's handwriting. He wondered when Barry had put that there, because, while the man was fast, he hadn't seen the speedster leave the party before him. Ever curious, he picked up the letter and opened it.

 _Cisco,_

 _I am sorry that I have failed you as a best friend. I haven't been there for you the way I should have been. It's my fault Dante is gone in this timeline and you have every right not to forgive me. Getting over any loss is hard, whether it be a mother, father or brother. But the loss of your brother, at a time when the two of you were finally working on your relationship, has to hurt the most, especially when you learned that it was a direct result of something a friend did. And that the friend in question was someone who could have fixed it if he'd wanted to, but instead was the one who caused the death in the first place._

 _I take full responsibility for everything and understand completely why you feel so angry and betrayed._

 _I had hoped we would eventually rebuild the friendship we had before everything that happened with Zoom, or even to when I first returned from Flashpoint. You may have been hurt at first, but you'd forgiven my choice, until you discovered that Dante was still alive in the pre-Flashpoint timeline._

 _However, it appears Fate has other plans for me. There are always consequences to our actions. I am learning that my decision to save my mom, and then try to restore this timeline has resulted in more than just a few alterations to our lives than I could have ever imagined._

 _I did try and go back and fix this timeline once I learned what my changing the past twice did to everyone's lives in the present, but Jay stopped me. He pointed out that every time I do that, I put another crack in the timeline that used to be. If I could be sure that stopping the car accident that took Dante's life wouldn't cause any additional ripples in the timeline, I would go back and do it, Cisco, I would, in a heartbeat. But I can't. I can't risk anything else getting screwed up._

 _But while I can't fix my mistakes, I can atone for what I did. I can do the right thing. I can't let the world suffer for my mistakes. I know that you may never forgive me for the loss of Dante, but I hope one day you realize that I came back to this timeline, even if things weren't exactly as I left them. I chose this version of my life, the one with Joe, Iris, Wally, Caitlyn and you, my family._

 _Don't let Caitlyn fall to the Dark Side. She's got too much light in her, too much goodness. You need to keep reminding her of that. I have a feeling, while she may want to get rid of her powers, she can find a way to turn them into something good. You need to help her see it, too._

 _I will now go from a Star Wars reference to a Star Trek one and leave you with the immortal words of Spock: I have been and always shall be, your friend._

 _Barry_

Cisco wiped a stray tear from his eye. He was glad they had made their peace earlier. If not, then he would have definitely felt like a huge heel now. He was definitely going to be a better friend to Barry moving forward, and the first step was going to be convincing the speedster to come back and take up residence on his couch once again. No one should be forced to sleep on those uncomfortable cots they had around the lab, unless your last name was Wells.

He made his way towards Barry's temporary living quarters, and paused just before entering at the sound of a voice that was distinctly not his best friend's. He could clearly hear Iris giving the speedster a dressing down. Apparently, she'd found out that the young hero had almost left them all behind to be a martyr and she wasn't happy about it. He wondered if someone had told her, or if, like himself, she'd received a goodbye letter from Barry. Not wanting to get in the middle of the two lovebirds, he turned around and headed back towards the Cortex to check for alerts and send the message to Kara.

He'd text Barry later and offer up his couch again, but Cisco had a feeling his friend wouldn't be spending the night in the lab after all.


	8. Conclusion - Iris & Barry

**Conclusion: Iris & Barry**

"Bartholomew Allen…what the _hell_?" Iris stormed into Barry's temporary sleeping quarters. "You were seriously going to go off into space as some sacrifice and all we were going to get from you was a piece of paper saying goodbye."

Standing near the cot he'd been lying on moments before, Barry shrugged and gave her an apologetic look. "I know it seems like the coward's way out, but if I'd come to see you in person, I wouldn't have wanted to leave. And at the time, I thought it was the right decision."

"That's what you said in here." Iris waved the letter in front of her as she walked over to where he stood, a million thoughts running through her mind at the sight of him safe and sound. She'd spent the last few hours trying to work on her article, and had only managed to get half of it done. For the majority of the time she should have been writing, she'd stared more at her phone and the picture of her and Barry on her desk than her computer screen. By the time she'd arrived at the newspaper, after the phone call with her dad, she'd already checked her phone at least twenty times wondering why her boyfriend had yet to text her. She had debated calling or texting him, but then dismissed it immediately, after all, she wasn't the one who planned on being selfless. Plus, she figured he was probably busy meeting the President.

Then she had berated herself, because, after all, Barry was a hero. He had always been the one to put others before himself. She thought of the sixteen years Henry had sat in a cell, and the fact that Barry had spent his entire adult life with one goal in mind, to get his dad out of prison. He always stood up for those who couldn't stand up for themselves. How many times had he come to her rescue, even before he'd become the Flash.

She then tried to get more of her article written, but every time she wrote something about the Flash, she'd check her phone one more time to see if she'd received any word from him. When nothing appeared, the whole cycle of emotions would start again. First came frustration, then anger, then guilt at herself for being angry, then frustration, and then anger all over again. After the tenth time, she had finally decided that she'd had enough, and went in search of the man keeping her from her deadline.

Having gone through the range of emotions once more as she moved closer to her boyfriend, Iris realized, in that moment that none of it mattered because he was here, in front of her, whole and unharmed. She took one final step and pulled him in for a bone-crushing hug. For a brief instant, she was afraid to let go, for fear that he'd run off at five-hundred miles per hour, or try and turn himself over to aliens again.

"I'm sorry." Barry wrapped his arms around her. Being this close to her now, he was glad that he hadn't surrendered. No matter what his reasons had been, he was glad Oliver and his little 'army' had kept him from leaving his family and heart behind.

Iris gave him one more squeeze then stepped out of the embrace and smacked his arm, hard. "What were you thinking? Did you forget about Dr. Alchemy and Savitar? Or all the metahumans cropping up every day because of speed gods and particle accelerator explosions…you can't just leave us like that." She smacked his arm again. "You're an idiot, you know that right?"

Barry grimaced and then he gave her a sheepish grin. "Yeah, I do. In the end we were better off fighting as a group and showing them what we were made of rather than me surrendering. Turns out, that despite my attempt to do what I thought was the right thing, Oliver wasn't going to let me get away with it anyway. When he couldn't talk me out of turning myself over to the Dominators, he got the whole team to stand behind him, even Cisco. I don't know why Ollie insisted I was the best one to be in charge, we all know he was the true leader."

"If I thought he was hotter after finding out that he was the Green Arrow, I think knowing that he kept you from doing something truly asinine just put him even higher on my list. He was number three, but I think he's moved up to number one."

Barry rolled his eyes but sighed. "I guess I deserve that." He then raised his eyebrows and looked at her with a determined gaze. "You're not seriously keeping him on that list are you? I mean it just seems wrong somehow, considering the fact that you've actually met him and he's not a rich billionaire anymore."

Iris smirked and shrugged her shoulders before sitting down on the cot and placing the letter beside her on the thin mattress. "Barry, promise me you won't do something like that again. Don't just run off and leave us. I love you, my life isn't complete without you in it. We're just starting to build a future together. I know you feel guilty about the time travelling mess but giving yourself up to a race of aliens, is not the answer. Cisco will come around. We'll help Caitlyn with her powers. You got me and dad talking again. The West family is back on track. The rest of the team will be okay. But we won't be without you. Just remember that." She looked him in the eye, hoping to convey the seriousness behind her words. "You can't take responsibility for every bad thing that happens around here. I know you're a hero, but you can't fix everything."

"I know, and I'm working on it, and actually Cisco and I, we're going to be okay. He's forgiven me." Barry sat down on the makeshift bed next to his girlfriend. "I know it's going to take time, but at least he sees me as a friend again."

"That's great. I knew he'd eventually come around. Was it because you were an idiot?" She shoulder bumped her boyfriend, and grinned at him.

Barry shook his head. "No, turns out that Cisco's own adventure through time put what I did into a new perspective for him. He and Felicity joined some of the Legends on a trip to the past to try and get answers out of one of the Dominators back when they first came to Earth. And apparently a choice they made back then is what made the alien leader decide that metahumans were too much of a threat to their world now. I have to wonder if I _had_ turned myself over, would it have made a difference in the end anyway."

Iris shuddered involuntarily as she turned to look at him. "I don't want to think about." Having had enough talk of aliens and almost losing Barry, she decided a change of topic was in order. "So, do I get an exclusive interview with the Flash? You know, an actual behind-the-scenes exclusive for this investigative reporter. Especially since you're the reason I'm going to have to get up at the crack of dawn to make my deadline."

"Of course. There's no other reporter I'd want to write this story." Barry put his arm around Iris, and felt warmth flow through him as she rested her head on his shoulder. And then his thoughts turned to ones of confusion. "What do you mean you haven't met your deadline? I thought for sure you'd have had a five page article done by now. It can't be that you don't have enough material. You were at the hangar for most of the time leading up to everything. Is it because you're here, now, instead of working on your article."

Shaking her head, Iris elbowed him in the side. "No dork. It's because I spent the last two hours being mad at you and frustrated with you and relieved that you were here, and then mad that you were going to sacrifice yourself and leave your family behind. And then mad at myself for being mad at you for being who you are." She raised her head from his shoulder to glare at him. "And then mad at you again for not even thinking to call me to tell me, your girlfriend, the love of your life, that you were okay."

"Sorry, again." Barry placed a gentle kiss on the side of her head. "Between meeting the President, and then wrapping things up, I kept losing track of time. I almost did call you once or twice when there was a lull in activities, but I didn't want to interrupt you. I know how focused you get when you're writing. Then by the time I got back here, I figured you would be fast asleep."

Iris sighed. "There you go again, making my anger fizzle because you were thinking of what was best for me." Wrapping her arm around Barry's waist, she pulled him a little closer and laid her head back on his shoulder. "So, what was it like meeting the President?"

"It was so cool to be up there on that stage with everyone, having the President of the United States thank all of us for saving the world." He chuckled. "If she realized that amongst those she called heroes was a vigilante who moonlights as a mayor, an ex-assassin raised from the dead, and a criminal with an unhealthy love of fire, she might have rethought her speech."

"Well criminals or not you all were heroes today." She traced lazy circles on her boyfriend's leg. "You realize that even if you think Oliver might have been the true leader, you were the reason all those heroes came together. You inspire people."

"Funny, that's what Oliver told me when I first started out." He put his hand over Iris' and entwined their fingers together. "But really all I did was recruit Oliver and Dig, and then with Cisco's help brought in Supergirl. Ollie was the one who knew how to contact the Legends. But it was kind of thrilling working as a team like that. And it was both cool and strange to meet Mari's grandmother. I'm just glad that Oliver finally warmed up to Kara."

Raising her head, Iris glanced questioningly at her boyfriend. "Who's Mari?"

"You've heard of the woman in Detroit with the strange necklace, saving people and goes by the name Vixen? A name given to her by Cisco, by the way." He watched his girlfriend nod. "Amaya is her grandmother, at least that's what Cisco and I deduced. We believe they're related in some way since Amaya is really from the 1940s and wears the same exact necklace as the one Vixen has around her neck."

"Time travel is so weird." Iris squeezed Barry's hand, hoping the simple gesture would keep him from thinking dark thoughts. "Speaking of Kara, how come you never told us about her before now?"

Barry shrugged. "Honestly, when I returned from testing the tachyon device, everyone was talking about how fast I'd run, and I realized I'd returned to the exact moment I'd left, no one even knew I'd been gone an entire day. Then we all got wrapped up in defeating Zoom, I never found the right time. Before I knew it, everything just happened so fast. Wally got kidnapped, Zoom took my speed, I got my speed back, the race with Zoom… I just never got around to it, and then it completely slipped my mind."

"Well, she's very nice. I'm glad she was here to help." Iris tried to stifle a yawn with her free hand.

"It's late, you should get home." Barry rose from the cot and pulled her up with him.

Iris wrapped her arms around his neck. "It is late, but I'm not going home alone. The thought that I might have lost you, forever…" She glanced down briefly before looking back up into his eyes. "You're coming home with me, Flash." After the events of the past few days she had no intention of letting him out of her sight. She knew, without a doubt, she'd have to reassure herself several times throughout the night that he was indeed safe and sound and by her side. "Besides, after the last few days, you won't get a good night's sleep on this old thing," she gestured with her head, "and I bet you haven't rested peacefully in a while."

Barry put his hands on her waist. "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely." Iris gently tugged his head down and brought his lips to hers. She relaxed into him when he returned the kiss. The embrace lasted only a few moments, and when they pulled back, she leaned her forehead against his. "But if you ever try and say goodbye to me in a letter again, Barry Allen, no matter how good your intentions are, I promise, if you make it back you won't like me when you see me again. In fact, I think I'll have Caitlyn use her powers and turn you into Frozen Flash…are we clear?"

Barry nodded with a grin before pulling her into a comforting hug. "I promise to talk to you in person before I do something stupid again."

"Good." Iris stepped out from the security of his arms and took his hand in hers ready to lead him out of the room and towards home.

Before they took a step in the direction of the hallway, Barry's eyes fell on the letter on the cot and while Iris may have read hers, maybe the others hadn't yet seen theirs and he would have time to collect them. He gently tugged on her hand, causing her to pause. "Let me just gather up a few things and I can meet you at your place."

Iris caught the direction of his gaze and had a feeling she knew what was going on in in that brain of his. She tightened her hold on his hand. "Let's get one thing straight right now, Bare. I'm not letting you out of my sight, so, as long as you're only planning on gathering the essentials for staying with me tonight, that's fine. I'll just wait right here while you get your stuff together. After all it's a simple task that isn't going to take you half an hour, Flash." With her free hand, she gently turned his face towards her. "But if you're thinking of running off and collecting whatever other letters you left behind, like the one to Dad and Wally, you can just forget about it." The speedster opened his mouth to protest, but she quickly moved her finger from his chin and placed it over his lips. Shaking her head slightly, she continued, "Chances are they've already read them, and if they haven't, they deserve to read them. You didn't put anything in the letters they shouldn't read just because you're still with us, did you?"

Barry shook his head and let out a resigned sigh. "Other than telling Wally he was going to be the guardian speedster of the city, no." Then, with his free hand, he gently removed her finger, and then brought their entwined hands up and placed a gentle kiss on the back of her hand. "But you're right, as usual. I've said it before, I can't be who I am without you, Iris. You're my reason for being, my anchor."

Leaning down slightly Iris picked up her letter, and then, letting go of his hand moved to the doorway. "Now gather up your stuff, and let's go before the universe decides some crisis needs your attention. Then, in the morning, the Flash will give this reporter a one-on-one interview so I can make my deadline." She leaned against the entryway, effectively blocking his exit.

Knowing when he was beaten, Barry sped around the room and within seconds had a duffle bag filled with what he would need for the night and tomorrow. He then stopped in front of her, smiling at her now disheveled hair from the wind his speed had caused. He gently smoothed the soft tendrils back in place, before taking her hand in his once again. They moved into the hallway, walking side by side. Barry gently squeezed Iris's hand, feeling lighter than he had in a long time. Cisco had forgiven him, he wasn't a prisoner aboard an alien spaceship, and he was going home with the woman he loved. He didn't want to think about speedster gods and doctors with the ability to give powers to metas tonight. For the rest of the evening, he was going to take comfort in being with Iris, and deal with what came next after a good night's sleep.

 _ **The End**_

 **Author's End Notes:**

In the Prologue, I changed the events of Arrow, Season 3, episode 21 "Al Sah-Him" to coincide with the effects of Flashpoint. In the original episode, when Ollie kidnaps Lyla, it's baby Sara who is left behind unattended. However, because of Flashpoint, and Dig now having Baby John instead of Sara, I adjusted Oliver's telling of the events accordingly.

With regards to the mention of Amaya from Legends being the present day, Mari's (aka Vixen's) grandmother, when the list of the new characters for Season 2 of Legends were posted, it was mentioned in the write-up that Amaya was in fact, Mari's grandmother. I took the liberty of mentioning it here, and adjusted to account for the fact that Amaya most likely has no ideas she has a granddaughter who is the vigilante of Detroit.


End file.
